muse

it took me 5 hours to appreciate the beauty within
the beauty hidden in letters and numbers
the grace and elegance in her decisions
the glamour i witnessed in her silenced laughter
the sincerity in her virtues and courage to let go
the proportionate happiness we imparted each other
was vivid, like when i fell before, the warmth
i can feel the warmth again
but why now, it seems all too late
for me to encounter such muse
of great wisdom, knowledge and virtue..
had all the year been more happy if i had engaged with her earlier?
most likely..
the boundless conversations..
i can say so many things
so many seconds i can spend by her side
i am being inclined to rest my head on her shoulder

but all my apprehensions and anxiety tied with my insecurities mess all the beauty i see.

i'd be running less. worrying less. thinking less.
all inside that's my head is piano and how sleepy i was